Time & Growth
by DanieXJ
Summary: I felt that I needed to do something about the episode "Rampage" from ER's Season 7. This is what resulted. Has nothing to do with canon, or my other stories.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Time & Growth

Pairing(s): Kim/Kerry

Summary: I felt that I needed to do something about the episode "Rampage". This is what resulted. It was a new format for me at the time alternating Kerry then Kim viewpoints.

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me...and this story has nothing to do with any of my other serieses.

* * *

**Kerry**

Kerry leaned heavily as she walked into the staff lounge and yanked a box over onto the table by her locker. She roughly pulled open the door, it slamming against Luka's locker with a crash. She looked

inside and sighed. She removed the coffee mug that she had used every shift for the past six years at County. Parts of the handle's design had been worn off from so much use. She placed it in the box. She looked back in and found her "emergency" gear for if she forgot to put on what little make-up she wore to work. She tossed that in without a second thought. She reached back in and pulled out a few sheets of paper. She closed her eyes wearily and thought about these sheets. They were tear stained in some places, and in other places the ink was scratched so deeply into the paper that it looked like Braille. She carefully folded up the first draft of "The Letter" as she was starting to think of it as. She reached

back into her locker for the one last thing she knew was in there. Kerry held it in her hands for a few moments staring down at the laughing, smiling faces. It hadn't been anything expensive. They had been walking around some mall one day, and somehow Kim had convinced her to have their picture taken in one of those Automatic picture booths. When the photos had emerged Kerry had cringed, but Kim loved them and had taken all but one into her possession, to do who knows what with. The one that Kerry had kept though, she thought it was the best. Kim wasn't looking at the camera she was glancing at Kerry. The camera had caught this second of time, where Kim seemed to glow from within. Kerry had seen it happen before when they were talking, or more precisely when Kerry was talking and Kim was laughing and flirting. But this picture had the glow on paper.

Kerry slowly placed the picture in her wallet. Took off her lab coat, ID and stethoscope and grabbed a file from one of her sparsely filled desk drawers. She slowly walked through her ER for what was

probably the last time. She came to Luka at the admit desk. "Luka, could I ask you a favor?" She leaned her box up against the Admit desk. "If Kim...Dr. Legaspi asks. This is where I can be reached."

Kerry handed over a piece of paper with a number on it.

Luka nodded, confused, "Are you going somewhere Kerry?"

Kerry smiled sadly, "Don't be afraid to try for the chief position Luka. Mark is too much of a loose cannon. You can tell Chen that I cleared her to work more than 60-hour weeks. She'll be a good Chief

Resident. Tell Malucci that he had better sit straight and fly right, or I WILL be back to kick his ass. And John...tell him I'm sorry."

Luka started to speak but Kerry didn't spare a moment to start walking out of the Ambulance bay. Over her shoulder she spoke, "Oh and Luka, tell Abby you love her...and mean it."

Luka stood there and stared at Kerry's retreating back open mouthed before yet another GSW went critical.

* * *

**Kim**

Kim stood in the doorway to her office. She had put so much of herself into this job, had so many expectations. She was going to be an Attending at County General Hospital of Chicago. Reputed to be

one of the craziest hospitals out there. And this wasn't even taking into account the patients. She shook her head, all this, had gone down the crapper because she was gay, and because the chief of staff

seemed to only want tall lanky blondes that he could date on the staff of the hospital.

She shook her head as she glanced down at the box that was full to the brim with her personal possessions. The pictures at the top caught her attention. It had been a day at the mall. She had needed

to get some more shirts, since Kerry seemed to be taking them in the morning, and then forgetting them at her own apartment. Kim didn't really mind, she kind of liked shopping. And then, she had spotted one of those Automated Picture Machines. Kerry had been not too keen on the idea of getting her picture taken. And so during the first frame of the pictures Kim had been trying to get Kerry into the shot. She had given that picture to Kerry, not knowing why the woman was so enamored by it. But she had taken the rest for herself. Once Kerry had gotten in the shot and Kim had convinced her to smile Kerry lit up the booth with her smile.

Kim shook her head. She didn't understand how everything could have gone so wrong and in such a short amount of time. She stowed the pictures in her wallet, and started to walk out of her office. But

was stopped by DeRaad in the doorway. "What can I do for you Carl?"

Carl smiled, "I have good news, something has caused Romano to change his mind. The man positively looked green in the gills. But you still have you job here Kim...if you want to stay."

Kim frowned, "Carl, I don't know. No one at this hospital seems to respect me all that much."

Carl gaped at Kim, "Are you kidding. You are the most requested Psych doctor on the ER rotation. If I could assign you permanently down there, I would...look. The only one who really has a problem is

Romano. If you really don't believe me...I'll do a poll. That's what we Psychologists are good at right? Polls, graphs..."

Kim laughed, "Okay, I'll stay, but if Romano..." Kim trailed off but Carl got the idea and nodded. "He will be on his best behavior. And he was mumbling something about the Men's room being sacred ground and how the bitch had broken it. I don't know, maybe he needs to get a Psych consult."

Kim smiled, "Just as long as I don't have to do it Carl."

Carl chuckled, "So...I'll see you tomorrow then?"

Kim nodded as Carl left the room. "Why do you do it Kimberly? You will never learn..."


	2. Chapter 2

**Three Months Later**

* * *

**Kim**

Kim walked in the ER, she wasn't down on a Psych Consult, but she just wanted to be sure that the place hadn't spontaneously combusted or something like that. It wasn't the same ER that it had been three months ago. For one thing, Kim had spent most of the three months upstairs in the Psych Ward instead of down in the ER responding to the ER's doctor's pages. Kim shook herself out of her musings and walked to the Admit desk.

Randi glanced up, "Oh, hey Dr. Legaspi, what are you doing down here?"

Kim shrugged, "Had a break, any human Kangaroos or Possums come in?"

Randi shook her head, "Nope, nothing interesting for a while now. Though we did have a guy not to long ago that thought that he was Batman. His "bat cave" had collapsed in on him."

Kim shook her head, "Go off for twelve hours and I miss all the fun."

Randi looked at Kim quizzically for a second and then got an understanding look on her face, "Ah, sarcasm, haven't had much of that down here either. Hey, you would probably love the current bestseller. Has been on top for a couple of weeks, but no one has ever seen the author in person."

Kim shook her head negatively, "Nope, haven't had a lot of time for reading lately. Been pulling a whole lot of double shifts since we had one of the other Psych Attendings quit."

Randi nodded, "Lot of that going around. I heard that Dr. Weaver is suing the hospital for discrimination of something like that."

Kim raised an eyebrow at this and smiled. "Randi, it is not like you to spread second hand gossip. Now, I would never make you reveal your source." Kim smirked, "But I seriously doubt if that is the case."

Randi had Kim just where she wanted her, "Ah, so then you have heard from Dr. Weaver?"

Kim held up her index finger and wagged it at Randi, "Nice try Randi, but you seem to be loosing your edge a bit."

Randi typed some on the computer before she answered Kim, "It is true. And it is all Dr. Weaver's fault. Hey, you free on Thursday." Kim raised an eyebrow at Randi, "Not like that, sheesh, what a dirty mind Dr. Legaspi. Supposedly there is a book reading where Carolyn Weave will come out from hiding and read some things from her new book." Kim started to speak, but Randi interrupted her, "And it's

no where near any major meal or snack."

Kim laughed, "Sure, though I haven't read this book, what is its title?"

Randi thought for a second, "It is something really random and in another language..."Casus et Novae"."

Kim tilted her head to one side, "Really? Interesting. Where is this shin dig happening anyway?"

"The African. It is a book store I guess. Personally I didn't know that it existed. So, want to meet outside or something?"

Kim nodded distractedly, "Right, sure. It'll be fun. Maybe you'll get some more gossip for your ER mill."

Randi looked confusedly at Kim's retreating back, "Gossip, from a book reading...what?"

* * *

**Kerry**

"Dr. Weaver, are you really back for good? Some of use thought that you were abducted by aliens or something." Josh asked.

Kerry paused the unlocking of her door and turned towards the teen. "I should be Josh. How is school going. Still getting good grades?"

Josh blushed, "Yes Ma'am, your help in Bio a couple of months ago helped...thank you."

Kerry smiled at the young teen who had been having a little trouble in school at the end of last year. "I had a lot of time on my hands."

Josh's blush got deeper, "Um...oh yeah. My mom said that she saw a tall blonde haired lady hanging around your apartment a few months ago also. She said that she looked...umm...official. She was worried that she was like IRS, or FBI or ATF or something."

Kerry raised an eyebrow at ATF, but smiled what she thought was a reassuring smile, "Tell your mom not to worry Josh. But tell her thank you for informing me."

Josh nodded, "See ya, Dr. Weaver."

Kerry shook her head as Josh kept walking down the sidewalk and she finished unlocking her door. She slowly surveyed her entrance. It hadn't changed at all except for a small pile of mail by her door. She

had been gone three months, and the pile only came up to her ankles. She slowly stepped around it and put her laptop down. She then sniffed the air. It had the tang of sour milk on it. She went to the kitchen muttering to herself, "I could have sworn I threw out the milk before I left." She plugged back in and opened the refrigerator. There was not a speck of food or drink in it. "Then where the hell is the sour milk smell coming from." She kept walking around the apartment sniffing the air. Finally she came back to the front door. The smell seemed to be coming from one of the envelopes on the floor. She slowly sifted through them until she got to a pink one on the bottom. She held it up to her nose and almost gagged. "This would be it. Now, who is the...oh..."

At that moment the phone rang. Kerry looked for a long time at the pink envelope before she closed her eyes and tossed the envelope on her end table for later, after she had gotten settled in. She answered

the phone. "Dr. Weaver...damn...sorry...hello?"

The voice on the other end laughed, "Guess you can take the Weaver out of the Doctor, but not the Doctor out of the Weaver." There was a pause, "Was that as confusing to you as it was to me?"

Kerry smiled a genuine smile, "Yes, yes it was Kim. So, what's up?"

"How are you faring Kerry. All this attention must be different than the attention you got being a doctor?"

Kerry swallowed, her mood eroding a little bit. "Yeah, it definitely is different. Can I do something for you? Or were you just checking up on me?"

A hearty laugh floated out of the receiver of the phone. "Well, are you ready to come out..."

Kerry chuckled, "Again?"

This time it was a groan that was issued from the other side of the conversation, "That was a truly bad joke Kerry. I meant as the author of the cult hit "Casus et Novae"

Kerry did a double take at the phone, "Cult hit? Let's take this one book at a time Kim."

"Aw come on, it is gripping and suspenseful."

Kerry smirked, "Yeah, I read that too. Except for the fact that I read a review of "The intricacies of C++ and how it might change in the next two years" and that was called gripping and suspenseful. So..."

Kerry could practically see Kim's eyes rolling on the other end of the phone. "Anyway, remember, Thursday, at The African."

Kerry swallowed, a whole lot nervous than she should have been. "Yep, Thursday, Africa...I mean the African. It is just like presenting a paper right?"

"Yep, and you don't even have to defend it. Are you sure that there isn't anyone that you would like to be there for your unveiling?"

Kerry glanced over at the pink envelope, "No, no one. But hey, you'll be there right? So, I'll have at least one audience member to read to. You have been such a great help."

"Just doing my job Kerry. I'll see you then." With that they disconnected and Kerry walked into the kitchen to get herself a cold drink.


	3. Chapter 3

**Kerry**

Kerry paced back and forth and back and forth in the manager's office at The African. Wearing three distinct tracks in the puke green carpet. Finally the door to the office opened. Kerry whirled to face

it. "Damnit Kim, you're three minutes and forty-seven seconds late. I thought that all this was going to go to hell in a hand basket."

Kimball laughed as he wrapped Kerry in a giant bear hug, a feat that only he could get away with at the moment. "Ah, don't be nervous Kerry. You aren't the first to go through this, and you won't be the last.

Kerry nodded and set her jaw as she slumped into a chair, "I know Kim, and I've been under pressure before, hell, I've been under more pressure on a daily basis than is normal. This isn't pressure, pressure is having a seventy-two year old man on the table bleeding out with only Malucci assisting, and the only clean instrument a pair of scissors. Or trying to dodge the bi-yearly gunmen who reign terror in the ER on almost a scheduled basis. One in November, one in May, it is an interesting phenomenon actually. Great, now I'm rambling, Dr. Kerry Weaver never rambles. Maybe it is an author thing." Kerry took a deep breath and seemed to calm down a bit. "Are there a lot of people out there?"

Kimball nodded, "And they all look very nice Kerry."

Kerry smiled a little, "Now that is patronizing me."

Kimball didn't even blink, "Who me? Never. There are also a couple of cute ladies front and center. Though I call the brunette. I don't think that I could handle the blonde. No tall ladies for me."

Kerry wasn't listening to Kimball's ramblings though. She was flipping through her heavily marked copy of Casus et Novae. "Cute...right...cute..."

The Manager came into her office and smiled almost nervously, "Let me say this again Ms. Weaver, thank you for choosing here to read some of your great book. It is all ready out there. So, anytime you're ready." The Manager quickly made her exit.

Kerry took a deep breath and with a perfectly straight face said, "Well, unless you want to put on a wig and raise your voice by a couple of octaves, I have to go out there. Wish me luck."

Kimball smiled, "Break a leg Kerry." Kerry raised an eyebrow and looked down at her crutch. Kimball playfully slapped his head, "Oh, right, you've been there, done that. Sorry, force of habit."

Kerry smiled and shook her head in bemusement as she went up to the podium that had been set up for her. She took a quick glance out at the audience to gauge who she was speaking to, and almost had a heart attack.

* * *

**Kim**

Kim shook her head as she and Randi sat down in the first row center of the audience. "You do know that we would be able to hear this woman just as well from the back. We don't have to be right in her face."

Randi shrugged, "You can try for a seat in the back, but I am not going to fight all the people who go for your seat the minute you get up. Good thing you are tall..."

Kim rolled her eyes, but stayed in her seat. "So, what is so hot about this book anyway?"

Randi shrugged, "I'm not sure, it just works."

Kim raised an eyebrow, ""Maybe I'll get a copy later."

The Manager interrupted their conversation when she stepped up to the podium, "Thank you all for coming. Feel free to browse and buy after the reading and signing." Kim barely suppressed a laugh. "And we will start momentarily."

Kim whispered to Randi, "Subtle sales pitch."

Randi shot Kim a look. Kim just looked confused at Randi's sudden mood change. Suddenly everyone's' eyes were fixed on the figure that was stepping up to the podium. Kim was confused when she recognized the person's tread from somewhere. She finally looked up when Randi gasped.

Kim's eyes got large as she met Kerry's eyes. They both got their composure back by closing their eyes. Kerry smiled her professional smile as she opened her eyes. "What a great turn out. If you haven't

guessed I am the author of "Casus et Novae", Kerry Weaver." Kerry slowly looked around the room. "No snipers, good sign." A chuckle ran through the audience. "Well, I guess that you are all here

to hear me read parts of my book. So, has anyone not actually read the book yet?"

Kim sat with her hands intertwined looking anywhere but the podium and Kerry. That is, until Randi elbowed her in the gut. Kim shot Randi a look that could kill and sheepishly was the only one to raise her hand. Randi spoke up, "She says that she hasn't had the time."

Kerry nodded, "Well, if you haven't, I have been reminded by Ms. Grocigian that you can buy a copy...or two...here at The African." She glanced at Kim, "Oh, and you can lower your hand now Kim."

Kim blushed to the roots of her hair as the audience chuckled. Kerry continued speaking "The first section that I have chosen to read is a very important part of the Story. The main characters learn something new about the other."

_A silent tear rolled down from Avery's right eye, and Josh reached to wipe it away. Avery caught his hand in hers, and held it to her heart. "Experience what you do to me?"_

_As Avery held his hand to her heart he felt her heart speed up, until he could take it no more and took the hand away sharply. "I...I don't want to hurt you. I'll leave."_

_Josh tried to move through the door, but Avery was there a second too soon, and blocked his way out. Sometimes Josh really wished that she would physically act her age. "The only way out, sir, is through my heart."_

_Josh gulped, "But...but Mac, I mean, we...I'm twenty-five years old, and you are..." He trailed off as Avery's lethal gaze penetrated his brain. "...Older than I am by...I mean...it is not..." He sank down to_

_the floor. Coming just short of fainting. In a small voice he continued, "I never considered..."_

_Avery seemed to snap out of a haze and as she helped Josh up she said. "I'm sorry Josh, I didn't realize until just now how strong I was coming on. Most people say that I come on quite strong in everything I_

_do. It is how I was raised. Tomorrow morning, before church, we can talk okay?"_

_Josh blinked a few times and shook his head, "Talk...Morning...right."_

_Avery smiled as she let him go into the study, where he was sleeping on the pull out sofa that Avery kept around just in case. Before she herself went to bed she glanced in at Josh. She was amazed at what she saw. He looked exactly his age when he slept. There was absolutely no stress in his features, and to her he looked like an angel sent down from above._

The audience barely moved as she finished reading this part. Kerry forged ahead. "This next part is one of my favorite parts although it is quite short.

_Avery thought for a second, "Josh, I'm going on a retreat with some pre-teens this weekend. Would you accompany us?"_

_"Wouldn't I be in the way?" Josh asked with a bit of hesitation in his voice. "I don't go to church often, so I don't know a lot about what to do."_

_Avery shook her head, "Josh, this is not a Catholic Church. and even if it were, I'm taking teens on this retreat, we are not going to start quoting scripture unless we have to."_

_This made Josh laugh, "If you have to?" What do you mean by that?"_

_Avery wiggled her eyebrows a bit and then smiled, "You know, Vampires, Demons, the Undead, sheesh, don't you watch Buffy? Come with us and find out Josh. It'll be an adventure."_

_Josh laughed, "Fine...fine...you convinced me. I'll go have the spiritual, or maybe demonal...is that a word...experience." Avery just laughed and shook her head at him as they exited the house._

This part of the story got laughs from all the audience, and Kerry took a deep breath. She did this more to prepare herself than anything else. She paused a moment to take a drink of water, and finally continued. "I figured I would end this reading, as short as it is, with what seems to be everyone's' favorite part of the story. Afterwards I will take a couple of questions." Kerry smiled, "Who knows if I will answer them though." The audience laughed, thinking that this was another of Kerry's jokes. Only Kim and Randi kept silent.

_Jamie had come over the next Wednesday to talk things over with her mother, and Josh decided that it would be better for them to be alone because he knew that even though Avery thought of him as a part_

_of her family he knew that Jamie would not. So he took his "idea pad" and moseyed over to the church. It was the middle of the week, so the only person there was Alice, who was both a long time member of the church and the church's secretary (i.e. the person who got everything done that needed to be done in the church.)_

_Alice was a conservative lady. She was in her late sixties, but she had the spunk of an eighteen year old. She was surprised when Josh poked his head in the office. He answered her unasked question right_

_away. "Her daughter came over. I thought it would be best to leave them alone to talk."_

_Alice smiled. She liked this young man, because in her opinion most of his generation would not think twice about imposing on other people. She asked in such and innocent way that Josh knew that she wanted something big done, "Would you like something to occupy your time Joshua?"_

_Josh smiled; Alice was the only person on the planet other than Avery who got away with calling him by his full name. "Of course I would Alice. Need some sweeping or dusting done? Currently I have I have a writer's block the size of the Hoover Dam in my head, so anything distracting would be much appreciated." He knew that Alice was more proud of how the church was kept up than anyone else. So much so that sometimes even the sexton just had to throw his hands up in defeat and let the lady have her way with the cleaning."_

_Alice put a hand out. Josh interpreted this right and helped Alice out of her chair. "Thank you so much Joshua. This arthritis has been acting up lately. As for the job, it is a little more physical than_

_dusting. We had something fall last night..." she trailed off, then cleared her throat. "I guess that I had better just show you."_

_Alice led the way into the Sanctuary. It was a gigantic space, and was the biggest part of the church. It was where the Sunday services were held, but also where all the large meetings about the running of the church happened. Josh immediately saw what had fallen and gasped, "Oh my..." He trailed off astounded by the sight. The pulpit was sitting in the middle of the front row of pews with shattered wood all around it. Josh looked at Alice and asked only one question. "Does Mac know?"_

_Alice's face contorted with anguish, "No, do you think that you can right it? I know that she is having lots of troubles in her life at the moment. I don't want to add to them._

_This kind of attitude was so like Alice that Josh almost laughed, but instead gave Alice a hug. She quickly became flustered at this, and slowly left Josh to figure out how in the world to lift the behemoth_

_of a pulpit back into position. He studied it with a bellboy's eye. He was no spring chicken, and sometimes when he had been bring people's bags up to their rooms he could have sworn that they had packed rocks instead of clothes. Josh was very glad, though, that the pulpit had not fallen totally off of its base._

_Once he had decided how to lift the thing back up, he slowly rubbed his hands together and took hold of the wood. He had almost gotten it back up into position when he heard a gasp and Avery exclaim, "Oh my God in heaven." She suddenly got some of her senses back and asked, "Josh, do you need any help?"_

_Josh grunted, "That would be much appreciated..."_

_Avery took some of the weight off of Josh's hands, and they got it back into position. They both stepped back a step, and Josh wearily sank down to the floor. Avery joined him and started giving him a slow_

_and even backrub. "What happened Josh?"_

_Josh grunted as Avery hit a knotted muscle, "I don't actually know. Alice did not give me the details, she just asked me to put it back in place."_

_Avery sighed as she leaned back against the first pew. "You know that pulpit has quite a story behind it."_

_Josh looked at the pulpit with a more critical eye. "It seems to have many different religious symbols on it."_

_Avery nodded, "That is why I replaced the old one with this one. You know that the congregation is made up of many different religious communities?"_

_Josh nodded and smiled, "Yeah, it has turned into 'Averyism'."_

_Avery shook her head and laughed, "Better than Macism. I found the pulpit in Israel, it wasn't a pulpit at the time, just a slab of wood. But my ex...husband...helped me to build the rest of the pulpit with_

_the carved piece as the centerpiece. The man selling it claimed that he had carved at least one symbol from every religion known to man on it. I'm not sure if I believe him, but there are a lot of religions_

_represented on that piece of wood."_

_Josh took a deep breath and changed the subject, "So, how did your heart to heart talk go with your daughter?"_

When she finished Kerry pointedly ignored Randi and took a question from a red head in the back of the store. "Hello, I'm Paulette, and I'm just dying to know, why did you choose to put the title in Latin?

Some people might see the title in another language and be turned away from the book? Oh and I totally loved it."

Kerry thought for a moment, "The title just flowed from the text for me. As for the second part of your question. If someone chooses not to read my book because of the language of the title then, I hate to say this, but I'm glad."

Another person asked, "Why did you keep your identity secret from your readers?"

Kerry blinked a few times and finally shrugged, "I have my reasons. I thank you for all coming."

With that the audience erupted in applause as Kerry stepped from behind the podium. Kerry just raised an eyebrow and made her way off the platform.


	4. Chapter 4

**Kim**

Kerry was so close to slipping out when she heard her name called. She turned and Kim was standing there alone. Kerry looked around Kim. "Randi went to work. You've just got me. So, this is where you have been hiding yourself."

Kerry nodded, "I wouldn't call it hiding. But yes, this is what I have been doing."

Kim nodded, "Are you happy?"

Kerry shook her head, "Nope, but I've gotten used to that by now. Had a lot of practice."

Kim frowned, "Did you read my letter?"

Kerry raised her eyebrows, "You mean the one that stunk to high heaven? Yes, but I don't see how it changes anything. We have both chosen our paths. Now we should follow them."

Kim looked crestfallen, "What if our paths meet again?"

Kerry shrugged, "I would like nothing more than that chance, but we've both hurt each other so much."

Kim got a glint in her eye, "Let's go out to lunch. You're done here right?"

Kerry nodded, "I should collect my belongings, but are you sure you want to..."

Kim nodded in what she assumed was a confident manner and Kerry went into the Manager's office.

A large man approached Kim, "You must be Kim Legaspi."

Kim slowly nodded, "And you would be?"

Kimball put his hand out "Kimball Jones at your service."

Kim shook his hand firmly, "Interesting choice of names."

Kimball shrugged, "Parents thought that Jones was too boring, so I got an interesting first and middle name. You don't want to know the middle one."

Kim raised her eyebrows, "You are probably right. So...?"

Kimball smiled, "So...oh, hey Kerry. Is this lovely dame taking you out for a bite to eat?"

Kerry nodded, "You are welcome to join us Kim...ball."

Kimball wagged a brotherly finger at Kerry, "No, I think I will leave you love...ladies to kibitz. Good reading Kerry. I'll call you, don't call me."

Kimball practically skipped out of The African. Kim shook her head, "Interesting guy."

Kerry chuckled nervously. "That...is an understatement."

* * *

**Kerry**

Kerry was more nervous now than when she had been getting ready for the book reading. She and Kim were sitting in a little cafe in a corner booth eating their respective late lunches.

Kim was the one to finally break the ice. "Do you mind telling me why you chose to publish your first book under a pseudonym?"

Kerry looked almost sad, as she responded, "Of course not Kim. To the public I would say it was because I have published papers as Kerry Weaver and I wanted this book to be separate from those publications. Still do. To you...I did it because if the book was not successful I could distance myself from it. Not the normal reasons for a pseudonym huh?"

Kim shrugged, not knowing what the normal reasons would be, and instead subtlety changed the subject. "Well, it shan't be a secret anymore."

Kerry winced, "Oh yes...Randi."

Kim smiled, "Yep," Kim glanced down at her watch which was miraculously at her wrist, "the whole hospital should know by now. I bet you get twenty book plates by tomorrow."

Kerry looked confused, "Book plates?"

Kim smiled smugly, "Why to sign of course."

Kerry rolled her eyes, "Right."

Kim smiled a genuine smile now, "No, really...but enough talk about your blossoming book career. Where have you been all summer girl?"

Kerry was finally brought to the lighter side as Kim's exuberance finally made Kerry crack a smile. "Different places. I visited with a friend in Montana." Kim's eyebrow went up at this statement and Kerry rolled her eyes and continued, "I also visited my brother in New York City."

Kim looked curiously at Kerry, "You have a brother?"

Kerry nodded and said almost wistfully, "Everyone should have a brother..." Then as if a light switch was thrown she snapped out of it. "Umm...yes...he is my adoptive brother...how is life at the hospital going?"

They were changing subjects faster than a college freshman. Kim looked seriously at Kerry, "I think you took all the crazies with you Kerry."

Kerry laughed, "You're probably right. Is Romano still an ass?"

Kim nodded grimly, "Yep, Greene is the new Head of the ER. He isn't doing badly, but seems to have been cowed by Romano. In his defense, I think that Romano has used Elizabeth's position as a fighting tactic. Kinda sucks though."

Kerry shrugged, "Nothing that can be done about it now though." Kerry nervously played with her coffee mug. "Are you still seeing Lori?"

Kim shook her head, "She had to go back to classes out west. She was only visiting her parents for a few weeks before summer session started." Kerry raised her eyebrows and Kim rolled her eyes, "For her PhD not her bachelors. Although she probably was a bit young for me, I like my women old and sometimes ornery and thick headed."

Kerry blushed bright red and slowly got her voice back, "You probably have to get to work?"

Kim looked down at her watch that had traveled all the way up to her elbow. "Ah yes, in fact I do. It has been fun sharing a table with you again. Perhaps we could meet for dinner sometime this week?" Kerry looked as if she were going to bolt. "I promise, two cars, and no overindulgence."

Kerry smiled, "As if two cars has ever stopped us before?"

Kim put on her best flygirl grin, "Ah, well, you have me there. Tomorrow night okay? Around eight, or is some other time better for you."

Kerry nodded as Kim collected her things. "At George's? I'll be there. Have...fun...at work."

Kim smiled, "You have fun on your extended vacation."

Kerry rolled her eyes as she watched Kim strut out of the cafe.


	5. Chapter 5

**Kim**

Kim rushed into the ER. She had gotten a page on her way to work and nearly caused a pile-up of her very own because she had forgotten to turn the pager from vibrate to an audible beep. She also almost ran into a crowd at the admit desk. She silently thanked her mother for her tall genes as she peered over the majority of the crowd to see what was the matter.

Randi glanced at Kim, "Okay Ms. Tall Thang, you tell me what's going on. Since none of these others will."

Kim glanced over at Randi, "Greene and Romano," Kim still spat his name out as quickly and venomously as possible when she had to say it. "They seem to be having quite a row. I'm going to get closer. Don't want one of them winding up in the Psych Ward."

As Kim got closer the background muttering of the gathered crowd diminished a little. And it stopped entirely when Greene whirled around and looking red faced and very tired yelled, "Back to work...all of you. NOW!" He wasn't done with his vocalizations yet though because it was then that he spotted Kim, "Where the hell have you been I've been..."

Romano cut him off. With a smarmy smile he spoke, "Dr. Legaspi how nice of you to show up. Did you have some business that was somehow more important than this hospital?"

Kim took a deep calming breath. "For one thing Dr. Romano, I was not on call, or scheduled to work for another half and hour and was on my way here when I got the page. And secondly, yes, it was more important than this hospital."

Mouths dropped in surprised at Kim's answer. Romano tilted his head to one side, "Well then, since you aren't on for another half an hour let's go to my office...we have...things...to talk about." His tone

brooked no argument, and Kim just shrugged and gestured for him to lead the way.

Greene was still sputtering, "But what about..."

Romano cut him off, "Call DeRaad, and you will implement what we talked about...right?" Romano raised his eyebrows. Greene nodded and walked over to the admit desk.

Romano lounged back in his chair as Kim finally took a seat. "See, it didn't bite you in the ass. You...I don't get you...beautiful blonde with brains to boot. Could have any guy you want..." Kim started to

interrupt Romano but he held a hand up to stall her, "I know...I know...lesbian. God, this job is so damn boring now. Do you know why?" Kim raised an eyebrow at the rhetorical question. "Right...it's because Greene is a damn good doctor, but as an administrator, he sucks. Kerry, now she was born to rule. We're a breed that's dying out. You know, I was grooming her for my position." Kim looked at Romano very skeptically. "Ah, you don't believe that I, Romano the little turd, could have an ounce of compassion of caring in me right?"

Kim shrugged, "It has crossed my mind on more than one occasion."

Romano nodded, "Ah, but I wasn't always the only one scorned and called evil at this hospital. You of course are wondering what my point is." Kim nodded her agreement but kept silent. Romano continued, "I want her back. Period. And you're the woman who can make that happen. The ER sucks without its core, its leader." Romano handed Kim a sheaf of papers. "For Kerry."

Kim looked straight at Romano, "If I do this, it doesn't mean anything changes between us. I would be doing this for Kerry. And she might not say yes. She may have a job somewhere else."

Romano threaded his hands together. "No, nothing changes between us. I still think that you should be fired for your...non-traditional style, and I won't stop trying. Call this a temporary truce. As for if Kerry

will come back, we evil types tend to know each other."

Kim nodded and got out of Romano's office as fast as she could.

* * *

**Kerry**

Kerry quickly moved to one side on the sidewalk leading to her house to avoid a scooter rider zooming down the sidewalk. "Hey, watch where you are going?"

The boy didn't even look back as he shouted, "Whatever."

Kerry shook her head as she entered her house and heard the phone ringing and rushed over to answer it. "Dr. Weaver." She shook her head as she realized how she had answered the phone again.

From the other end came a voice she didn't recognize. "Hello Dr. Weaver, my name is Dr. Kevin Kalane. I am on the board at Mt. Sinai."

Kerry responded, "What can I do for you Dr?"

Dr. Kalane continued in a rush of breath, "Nothing, but I can do something from you." He took a deep breath, "Our chief of staff is leaving the hospital. we had heard that you were no longer employed at

County."

Kerry cut right to the chase, "What exactly are you saying Dr. Kalane? In fifteen words or less."

Dr. Kalane again spoke quickly as if Kerry was going to cut him off, "We would like for you to submit..."

Kerry didn't hear the rest of his sentence as she heard a gigantic crash and a familiar voice yelling out in pain. Kerry interrupted Dr. Kalane. "I'm sorry Dr. Kalane, I'll think about...it. Good-bye."

Dr. Kalane sputtered on the other end of the phone as he was hung up on. Kerry meanwhile made her way outside.

Kim was sprawled on the ground in a very uncomfortable position. "Ouch."

Kerry started towards Kim but was waved away. "Go check the brat...the kid first."

Kerry nodded as she walked over to the boy who had almost run her down earlier. "Are you okay?

The boy nodded and gestured towards his shattered helmet. "Guess the stupid thing came in handy."

Kerry briefly examined the boy, and then as he got up looked at him very seriously, making sure that she met his eyes. "Tell your Mom what happened, and make sure that she takes you to see a doctor. Promise me?"

The boy hung his head, "I promise. But nothing really hurts." Kerry waited until the boy looked at her, "I promise Dr. Weaver." He turned around to leave but Kerry cleared her throat. "And I won't zoom up and down the sidewalk anymore. I start school on Monday anyway." To himself he muttered, as he walked his Razor Scooter back towards his house where his mother was out on the stoop looking mighty worried. "Not that I'll be seeing my friends any time soon."

Kerry rolled her eyes and went to look at Kim who had sat herself up. "Doing some self-diagnosing Kim?"

Kim smiled, "It is what Psychiatrists do best, eh?"

Kerry just raised an eyebrow with a ghost of a smile on her face. "You do know that you're a day early? Now, let's get you in my car. You need to get that leg looked at."

Kim put on her puppy dog look, "Aww... c'mon. I hate hospitals. You're a doctor..."

Kerry helped Kim to her feet, and somehow led them both to Kerry's car. "That of course explains perfectly why you chose to work in a hospital. And although I am a doctor, the rumor that I have X-ray vision is false."

Kim just stuck out her tongue and sagged painfully into the passenger seat of Kerry's car and stared out the front window.


	6. Chapter 6

**Kerry**

Kerry was again facing Romano in his office. "You mean Kim didn't tell you."

Kerry looked at Romano as if he had grown a third head. "What are you talking about Robert?"

Romano shook his head, "Of course she didn't tell you. Why would she actually do something she said she would."

Kerry frowned, "That's not fair to Kim. She did have other things on her mind. Like a broken ankle. But just for the hell of it, what didn't she tell me?"

Romano pursed his lips and took a breath. He looked less in control than he usually did. "I want to rehire you as chief of the ER."

Kerry shook her head negatively, "That wouldn't be fair to Mark."

Romano rubbed the bridge of his nose in agitation. "Look, let's say that you still worked here. I came to you, telling you that I was going to have...Cleo Finch...let go from the hospital." Kerry started to speak but Romano didn't let her. "Yeah, I know...can't do that...blah blah blah...what would you do?"

Kerry didn't answer Romano directly, "You fired Cleo Finch. Why the hell did you do that. Do you like to constantly have adversaries in each population of those who are not short white bald headed males?"

Romano smiled, "Actually I didn't fire her." Then he got serious. "I know that we don't have the best of records. And I can't promise that we will have smooth sailing. I would just like for you to think about it..."

Kerry thought for a moment, "I'll think about it. But that's all I can promise."

Romano nodded, "That is all I expected, now go check on your girlfriend."

Kerry started to speak, but instead just shook her head and walked out.

* * *

**Kim**

Kim tired to stretch out in chairs. But grumbled to herself as her cast screwed that up. Abby walked by and chuckled, "You just couldn't stay away huh? Busman's holiday."

Kim restrained herself from sticking her tongue out at Abby, and instead just huffed and rolled her eyes. "Believe me Abby, there is at least one place I'd rather be right now." Abby shook her head and continued her journey into one of the Exam rooms. Kim also shook her head and smiled. Until she realized that she still had a broken ankle and frowned and resumed trying to get comfortable.

An oddly familiar voice spoke from behind Kim. "You shouldn't frown Dr. Legaspi, it gives you wrinkles."

Kim looked up and smiled a business like smile. "Maggie, what are you doing here? Is everything all right?"

Maggie nodded, "If you mean, am I still on my meds, yes. It is as hard as hell, but yes. Have you seen my daughter?"

Kim smiled and nodded, "I think she is in Exam three...but..."

Maggie responded quickly with a small smile, "I'll just tell Randi and then go sneak into the lounge to wait for her. It was nice seeing you again Dr. Legaspi."

Kim nodded seriously, "You look good Maggie, you seem to be doing extremely well."

Maggie blushed as she walked over to the admit desk. Kim snagged a magazine off of the table by her and started reading. When Kim glanced up she smiled as she saw Kerry walking down the hall slowly. But it wasn't because of her crutch that the journey was taking so long. It was because every few feet Kerry was being stopped and spoken to. People that Kim didn't even know had very animated one sided conversations with Kerry. She finally arrived next to Kim. "So, you all set. Crutches, cast, heavy duty pain killers, game plan?"

Kim nodded, "Yep, just one problem."

Kerry smiled as they walked out of the Ambulance bay, "Ah, so you are stuck at my house for four to six weeks?"

Kim nodded absentmindedly and then shook her head negatively, "No...no...I mean...I just need you to drop me off."

Kerry thought about this for a moment and shrugged, "Nope...we need to talk. But Kim, have you ever thought of the irony that you drive a stick shift?"

Kim lowered her head in mock defeat. "You know, I'm surprised that it has taken a year for you to finally bring that up...Jeeze...Yes, I am very well aware of the irony. Now can I go sit down somewhere, cause I hate crutches." Kerry just rolled her eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

"Kerry, we're not talking..."

Kerry looked up and smiled guiltily, "Right you are Kim. Though, if you think about it, we have never really talked. Our conversations have always come in spurts and jerks."

Kim wiggled her eyebrows, "Ayup...so...?"

Kerry rolled her eyes, "Since you are off the clock, I'll tell you. Don't you tell every one of your patients that people in relationships have to communicate?" Kim nodded, "Well, we really don't do

that...never have. Probably why we got so screwed up. If I had just said 'I'm going to risk my job, career, what I thought was my whole being to keep you at County' instead of 'We have to do

something' Or if I had told you that I was scared shitless when you came out of Romano's office. I know, somewhere in my heart that you would never hurt me, or betray any confidence that we have,

but this is my...Achilles heel. I will give everything to someone without them even asking. A lot of the time they are in a coma, or don't even know what I am doing for them. But, when someone does that

for me, I...I don't believe them. You never asked for anything, and so I never gave anything. Look, I know that I did some pretty ass backwards things in the past year, and there is one thing that I really haven't ever said. Sure I said we have something good, I care for you, we are...we were great friends,

and I know that this is most likely too little too late, but Kimberly Legaspi...I love you."

Kim opened her mouth a few times before she could respond. But finally her mouth caught up with her brain. "Wow, you're right, and I think...that one of the things that I did wrong in this relationship

was that I was always on the clock. I analyzed you like you were one of my patients, and yet, I never really saw what you were going through. I should have remembered to the time that I was still coming

to terms with my homosexuality. Maybe I should have asked something of you, come right out and said what I waited until that letter to write. I was angry, but not at you, I was angry at what you did." Kim smiled softly, "Or didn't do in that meeting. I'm not sure what I can do to prove that I too...love you Kerry Weaver."

Kerry's face lit up with her smile, "Where do we start though?"

Kim also smiled as she leaned back into Kerry, who was sitting behind her because of Kim's cast. "Well, hmm...let's think about this. Thanksgiving is coming up..."

Kerry nodded, "And how about if I take you to work every day. Because you sure as heck can't operate your car with that foot."

Kim crossed her arms and pretended to pout, and Kerry waited with a smile on her face. Kim's eyes got large and she leaned back to look at Kerry. "Wait a gosh darn second there, you would be taking me to

work...with you...when you go to work?" Kerry nodded again, "So, the Ape-man convinced you then?"

Kerry shook her head negatively, "Nope, Mark did."

Kim looked extremely confused, "Why would he convince you to take the job that is his?"

Kerry smiled sadly, "Because as of about five minutes ago, he gave notice to Robert. Mark doesn't want many people to know, but the tumor is back. They don't know why, or how, or much of anything. But I think that Mark wants to spend as much time with Ella as possible. He and I have never really been the closest of friends or even acquaintances, we have stabbed each other in the back in the name of different causes on more than one occasion, but I gave him my word that I would talk to Robert tomorrow." Kim nodded slowly, and Kerry smiled and tapped Kim on the head. "Weren't you supposed to tell me something, or give me something when you were outside my door breaking your ankle?"

Kim slapped her hand against her forehead. "Dude, I plumb forgot. But I guess you got the message huh?"

Kerry shook her head and laughed, "Yes, yes I did. So, tonight has been...fun...but now..."

Kim rolled her eyes and sighed, "You'll drive me home...I know..." She slowly turned to face Kerry and put on her best puppy dog face. "Can I at least have a good night and I'm sorry that my snotty bratty

neighbor broke your ankle kiss?"

Kerry pretended to think about it for a moment, "Well, if you insist." Their lips met and melded as if they had never been separated in the first place.

Kim finally had to come up for air and was gasping for it while Kerry sat there as calm as can be. Kim slowly started the project of getting herself mobile again but had to know, "Okay, I have to know this, how in the world do you do that. You are never out of breath? Even..."

Kerry helped Kim put on her light jacket and the two of them crutched over to the door. "Even...yes...well...it is a result of my few years as an instrument player. Circular breathing."

Kim looked up in surprise, "What instrument."

Kerry shook her finger as they got into her car, "Nope, that question is best answer in our next session Ms. Legaspi."

* * *

Fin - June 11th, 2001


End file.
